Review: Russian Railroads

Review: Russian Railroads

Quinns: At the end of last year the rumbling around Russian Railroads became unignorable. Once a day I’d notice my mug of tea trembling as this game’s engine sped across the internet with a roar of hype. I decided to let it pass, though, knowing that if the rumours were true then this train, then progress itself would soon arrive at my sleepy flat.

Sure enough, Z-Man Games recently sent it over. Russian Railroads is a proud, barrel-chested member of a category called “Hard Euros”, and while that sounds like a DVD you’d find in the bargain bin of a sex shop* these are among the least sexy of games. Rather than forcing players to battle directly (which is RUDE), Eurogames offer a proxy-puzzle for players to simultaneously sweat over.

You might remember our review of T’Zolkin: The Mayan Calendar, with its dizzying, rotating gears, or our awe at the piglet maths of Castles of Burgundy, or our more recent video reviews of Caverna or Terra Mystica, each one an impressive eurogame. Today the industry is choked with these hale, rubust puzzles. Stepping inside the creaky carriage of Russian Railroads I had one question lurking at the bottom of my brain like cerebral sediment. “This game’s going to be clever and all, but do we need it?”

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Review: Eight-Minute Empire

Review: Eight-Minute Empire

Paul: Brendan! That’s a fine flag there. What is that the flag of? An organisation? A cause? An idea? Please don’t tell me it’s the flag of those most arbitrary of constructions, the nation.

Brendan: This is the flag of the Brendovian Empire. You will respect it. You will honour it. You will put it on mugs and t-shirts and probably socks at some point. We have destroyed our enemies. Laid waste to continents. Far is the reach of Brendovia. No persons in the world match the might of our brave men and women. No foreign fiend can meet the ferocity of our will. Our national dish is lemon tart.

Paul: Is that… Is that the Brendovian flag on the news? Is that Panama? Has your empire invaded Panama!? I don’t understand. When did all this happen? When did you found an empire!?

Brendan: About eight minutes ago.

Paul: Oh no. I know exactly what you’ve been playing.

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Games News! 14/07/14

Dungeon Fighter

Quinns: Morning, everybody! It’s a very special edition of the Games News today as we’re joined by SU&SD accomplice Leigh Alexander, former news director of Gamasutra!

Now Leigh, that’s an impressive resume, but don’t worry if you can’t keep up with the salsa-like tempo of the Games News.

Leigh: Thanks, Quinns. I’m really looking forward to this unique and challenging opportunity and I hope to learn a lot as well as have a great time doing it.

Quinns: That’s a great attitude.

Leigh: A positive attitude is the first step to a successful career.

Quinns: Fantastic. Let’s keep that mindset as we move forward in this space.

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Gold Club 3 closes in 24 hours!

Gold Club 3 closes in 24 hours!

Hello everybody!

With donations closing again in just 24 hours (at midnight EST, June 30th) we’ve got a last-minute addition to our third ever Gold Club bag. This season’s donors and all donors from previous seasons will get 2-4 weeks of early access to the SU&SD forum as we perform stress testing, ensure it doesn’t bring down the site and train our moderators in the rapid destruction of Quinns’ Netrunner threads.

If you hadn’t considered supporting SU&SD via the Gold Club, know that this one promises to be a doozy. It’ll have unedited RPG sessions, outtakes, Quinns’ Decks for the Aspiring Netrunner, a lovely bit of secret merchandise and a whole variety of limited-edition jokes. It’s basically an episode of SU&SD that you can have in your house, containing our actual fingerprints and DNA! So it’s kind of like we’re holding hands with all of you.

As always, a huge thanks to our donors. It’s amazing to be able to repay you guys, even if it’s in such a very silly way.

— Team SU&SD

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Games News! 23/06/14

Diplomacy

Quinns: Hello Quintin’s kittens, or my quiddens! Is that a good intro? It’s the worst, isn’t it. Let’s never do that again.

Our big news this week is that Days of Wonder has unveiled the box and artwork for Five Tribes, and you can see it above! We covered this classy collaboration with Bruno Cathala, designer of such unapproachably perfect games as Shadows Over Camelot and Cyclades, back in February. And as you can see above…

(The turn order tokens look like penises. Don’t say that. But what else can you say? It’s the elephant in the room, except it’s a neat row of penises pointing RIGHT AT ME)

…the board is, um… ah…

(DON’T SAY IT, QUINNS. YOU’RE BETTER THAN THAT)

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Announcing our 3rd ever Gold Club bag!

Announcing our 3rd ever Gold Club bag!

HELLO! You all probably know how the Gold Club works by now. If you like SU&SD you can support us with a donation, and we can have fun mailing you a little packet of joy.

With just 12 days left on the current season, we can proudly reveal that in addition to the usual papery surprises and a limited edition physical object (which is our favourite one so far), Gold Club 3 will contain Quinns’ Guide For The Beginner Netrunner! Downloads for the full audio for our Star Wars RPG evenings and any other RPGs we play for the next three months, which is literally dozens of hours of content! And a gut-busting compilation of outtakes, following on from where the last one left off.

If any of that tickles your pickle, our donate page awaits.

Sincerely,

— Team SU&SD

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Amazing Star Wars Adventures: The Prologue

Amazing Star Wars Adventures: The Prologue

And now for something a little different.

We want to provide an exhaustive review of the new Star Wars: Edge of Empire Roleplaying Game, which means we’re going to have to spend lots of evenings being crap in space. So why not let you guys in on it? Presenting… SU&SD’s Amazing Star Wars Adventures! The prologue of which has just arrived in our podcast section.

Starring Leigh Alexander as Beetle, wannabe bounty hunter! Quinns as ZB-33, her jury-rigged protocol droid! And Matt Lees as Fuse, a grumpy fish with lots of bombs. Our first session was mostly character creation and puzzling over rules so we’re calling this instalment a “prologue”, but it features a very dramatic moment where we successfully open a door. Enjoy, everybody!

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Review: 2.8 Hours Later

Review: 2.8 Hours Later

[Following Pip’s escape from a room and Quinns’ attendance of the Betrayer’s Banquet, we’re continuing our coverage of event games with 2.8 Hours Later. A disturbingly real zombie apocalypse for you and your friends to survive. Huge thanks to friend of SU&SD Steve Hogarty for writing this up for us.]

Steve: “Don’t run into traffic.” That’s typically the warning you’ll get from the last out-of-character member of the 2.8 Hours Later team you’ll speak to before the game begins. “The zombies can’t hurt you, but the 47 to Shoreditch can.”

It seemed very unlikely to our assembled group of survivors that we might all at once shed our collective common sense and dash out in front of a lorry, that we’d be wholly consumed by some primitive fear at the first sight of a zombie actor and run screaming across a dual carriageway like startled fawns. Fawns that scream. But that’s almost precisely what ended up happening.

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Review: Jaipur

Review: Jaipur

Brendan: Quinns? QUINNNNS. Where is he? He’s always late. Once again I have five crates of the finest Indian silks sitting in front of me, ready to buy — ready for transport! — and once again I can’t do anything with them because Quinns is late. He’s the one with all the camels! He should know by now to be ready! Where could he be?

Quinns [panting]: Sorry. Sorry! Whoo. Sorry.

Brendan: Just tell me you have the camels.

Quinns: Oh no, I traded those camels in ages ago. But don’t worry because – look! We have all these leather rags now.

Brendan: Hang on. Since when do you and I work as merchants in India, perched atop teetering camels, our saddlebags overflowing with rubies and saffron? I mostly remember us uploading penis jokes to the internet.

Quinns: This is a written review of Jaipur, Brendan! Anything is possible!

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Donations have been re-opened!

Donations have been re-opened!

An astonishing thing has happened! We’ve again succeeded at dispatching literally thousands of Gold Club packs around the world, full of limited edition jokes, swag, downloads and behind-the-scenes tidbits. If you’ve not received yours yet, you will soon.

If you feel like supporting the work we do and getting some swag mailed to your doorstep, donations are now open for next season, which will close June 30th! That’s last season’s bag you can see up there. Doesn’t it look nice? Go on. Treat yourself, and help us spread the good word about board gaming!

ALSO, we’ve a question for you. Quinns, Paul, Matt, Mike and Brendan will be attending Gen Con ’14 in America’s fashionable state of Indiana. To help cover the flights we’re considering selling a very limited number of seats at a sit-down dinner with us at the convention, as well as an intimate gaming session. If you’re breathtakingly wealthy and this excites you, please say so using the forms stuck right there in the pledge levels.

Thanks again, everybody.

— Team SU&SD

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