GAMES NEWS! 16/09/19

Ava: Hlph um kumphlll. Mummph blumph fulmph bugublfu

Quinns: What was that, Ava?

Ava: *large tearing noise and a series of ragged gasps* Help me, Quinns, I’m stuck inside this baseball!

Quinns: …

Ava: It’s an allegory, Quinns, and a warning that this week’s games news is a bit more inside baseball than usual.

Quinns: I can just about understand that, but how did you get in there!?

Ava: Never doubt my commitment to a bit, Quinns. Also, I’m sorry I ruined your baseball.

Read moreGAMES NEWS! 16/09/19

GAMES NEWS! 09/09/19

Ben: Oh jeez, I’m introducing the news. Please don’t let me break anything. They never let the intern pilot the Enterprise.

Ava: Luke Skywalker was basically an intern when he got a pop on an X-Wing, and he blew up an entire ‘that’s no moon’. Dream big, Ben! Blow something up!

Ben: Hello! It’s time for some gaming news! If you’re ready for it, great, if not let me know and I will tip you out of bed and shout news in your face until you’ve had your fill or I get tired.

Ava: That’s the spirit!

Read moreGAMES NEWS! 09/09/19

GAMES NEWS! 02/09/19

Quinns: Sorry I’m late to the doc, Ava. I put too many news-chillies on my news-pizza last night, and it has caused problems with my ability to use the news-toilet.

Ava: Hey! Adding the word news to everything is MY thing. Let me make you some news-peppermint tea, while you decide if you need any news-ointment for your poor, spicy news-bum.

Quinns: I thought I’d put you on the back foot by talking about my body, but I just feel like I’ve opened Pandora’s Box. Which isn’t the only thing that’s been opened this morning, let me tell you.

Ava: THAT’S ENOUGH OF THAT! TO THE NEWS.

Read moreGAMES NEWS! 02/09/19

GAMES NEWS! 26/08/19

Quinns: Ava, you must dampen the news and lift it to my forehead. Brighton is experiencing the last big, thick heatwave of the summer. I don’t know if I’ll survive.

Ava: It’s not just Brighton! It’s a bank holiday, so air all across the United Kingdom has turned into a thick, hot porridge, and I’m so glad we get to slip into a nice cool bath of news together.

Quinns: Ah, I forgot. Not only do the banks get a day off, so does air.

Not news, though! The news never stops, and we never stop never stopping it. Onwards!

Read moreGAMES NEWS! 26/08/19

GAMES NEWS! 19/08/19

Ava: Look at that, this week’s games news is mostly about travels! I’m on pseudo-holiday in sunny Glasgow. All the sequels are moving to Las Vegas, and other games are jumping onto tin boats and seaplanes. Not to mention what Quinns wants to get up to in San Francisco.

Quinns: Let’s hop on board the news travelator and send back some postcards.

Read moreGAMES NEWS! 19/08/19

GAMES NEWS! 12/08/19

Ava: Quinns, you’re looking a bit peaky today?

Ben (he/him): Erm…

Ava: Wait a second, you’re not Quinns! You’re three interns standing on each other’s shoulders in a long jacket!

Ben: We tried that, and we still weren’t tall enough to pass as the real Quinns. As a fresh new intern I’m contractually obliged to replace Quinns where required, whether that is providing irreverent board game news commentary or tasting any food he eats to check for poison.

Ava: Well then, unQuinns, let’s get you a past sell-by-date sandwich, a mop and a big bucket of news. There’s work to be done!

Read moreGAMES NEWS! 12/08/19

GAMES NEWS! 06/08/19

Ava: Quinns, is it getting hot in here, or have I just taken off all my clothes.

Quinns: Hopefully neither, it’s just that the site has been redesigned! And not unlike a person who’s taken off their clothes, the site is now smoother, sexier, and (most importantly) faster.

Ava: Ooh. It’s like you’ve snuck into my bedroom and tidied everything up. But not in a creepy way!

Quinns: I’m glad you’re feeling good, because it’s time for us to jump into the grand slurry of news which came out of GenCon. Hold your nose!

Read moreGAMES NEWS! 06/08/19

GAMES NEWS! 29/07/19

Ava: It’s Gencon this week, and do you know what that means? We’ve got to get in the news-canoe, sail to the heart of a newsicane, going right by a violent newscano. I’m all on my ownsome, without a Quinns to cling to. Wish me luck, and good news to you all.

This is the news, be careful out there, there’s a lot of it about.

First up we’re taking a trip to Cooper Island, a game that finally answers the question: ‘what if a eurogame, but taller?’

Read moreGAMES NEWS! 29/07/19

GAMES NEWS! 22/07/19

Ava: Quinns, Quinns, there’s a news emergency! The news pumps are overflowing.

Quinns: Don’t worry, Ava! That’s what they’re supposed to do.

Ava: But no, Quinns, you don’t understand, my cynicism valve has got wedged to ‘can only be excited about cats, Queen and civil disobedience’.

Quinns: Oh dear.

Ava: I’m even a bit surly about the moon!

Quinns: Well, that’s no good. Let me see what you’ve written, then you can report to Decontamination Chamber B for De-Grumping.

Read moreGAMES NEWS! 22/07/19

GAMES NEWS! 15/07/19

Ava: It was a busy weekend for ‘sports’ or as I like to call them ‘meat-games’, but that doesn’t mean the news wheel has stopped turning. Games gonna game and news is gonna news.

Quinns: Oh, you watched the Cricket World Cup final?

Ava: And something called ‘wombledown’ happened? I was drowning in crickets yesterday and it was a treat for rules-lawyers and fans of obscure tiebreakers everywhere.

Quinns: Ever on-brand, I was too busy playing board games this weekend to watch “sports”! I got to introduce four entire people to El Grande. I understand that the winner of Wimbledon was Woody Harrelson?

Ava: Sounds believable to me. Having had to research ‘Woody Harrelson’s face’ for the Monikers box, I doubt I’ll ever be able to escape his sturdy, well-cleft visage. Truly his countenance is a caballero hidden in the castillo of our hearts.

Welcome, everybody, to the excessively digressive games news.

Read moreGAMES NEWS! 15/07/19

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Only a few weeks until SHUX, so Matt is hard at work designing all the maps and signs and printed schedules! And he's doing it without looking at the screen! Reckless!!! ift.tt/2M2P3ff pic.twitter.com/WH8wmOmM0c

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