Matt: That’s not the Reddit alarm, that’s my egg timer. I’m making everybody lunchtime eggs to keep up our strength.
Quinns: Wow! I could kiss you.
Matt: Don’t kiss on me, daddy-oats, kiss on these great games.
Quinns: He’s a goner, Paul. There’s nothing we can do for him now. PRESS FORWARD.
Which isn’t to say that we always enjoyed ourselves...
Paul: BoardGameGeek is a titan of the board game scene, one of the most comprehensive and consulted sites the hobby has, as well as a place to which we owe a huge debt of inspiration. It's also home to the absolute Board Game Geekiest among us, namely those with a monthly allowance for small zip-lock baggies. While we undoubtedly fall into that category too, we appreciate that not everyone does and it's inevitable that our opinions will diverge, right?
Just what do we make of those most esteemed of titles that are forever locked in an eternal battle for a place in BGG's Top 100 rankings? This week, we'll be giving an extensive, nay, exhaustive breakdown of that list, telling you what we've covered, what we thought and even admitting what we've missed out on. So come with us as we count down the games in a whole week's worth of analysis and adventure!
Paul: Are you dying?
Quinns: Even better! Remember my positive review of Quadropolis (pictured above)? Days of Wonder has just announced the first expansion for it. Quadropolis: Public Services will see a selection of buildings laid out between rounds like a concrete chocolate box, and whether you select a fire station or get stuck with a convention centre, it’ll change how you score.
Paul: Quinns, I’m just going to stop you there. We’re going to go LIVE to this site’s resident Quadropolis expert for some analysis.
Paul: I did. What’s the world coming to?
Quinns: I don’t know, but I know we can’t stand for it.
Quinns: ...Paul, did you turn on the TV over the weekend?
Paul: No, I got the weirdest feeling that it would be rather like blasting a jet of pure sadness square at my own face.
Quinns: Right. Yes.
Paul: Good morning! Good afternoon! Hello! Happy New Year! The Games News has been building up like snow over the holidays and we’ve been doing our very best to clear it, shoveling the path and salting the drive. Nevertheless, it’s impossible to avoid slipping on some exciting new gossip or falling face-first into a pile of previews. Let’s get right into things by talking about… oh no.
Quinns: So get stuck in! Why not check out our swanky new search function? Zoom through years of Shut Up & Sit Down in seconds - hundreds of videos, articles, podcasts, and THINGS. Our new system combs the whole site in mere moments, runs completely silently, produces no waste, and has no moving parts. You can search as many times as you like and it’ll never wear out!
Paul: We also have a faster, better organised and (dare we say it?) sexier archive of every board game we’ve ever featured. Are you looking for a game for two, something with miniatures, or perhaps something conflict-free? At the click of a button, subsort those entries. I know, right?! If you feel dizzy, please just pause and take a seat on one of the many new plush sofas we’ve had installed. If you’re looking around and can’t seem to find one yet, a man should deliver it straight to your house at some point after 3pm. We do hope the colour matches your curtains. In retrospect, we probably should have asked.
Quinns: Paul, ask me some questions entirely at random!
Paul: Oh God what now.
Quinns: Also I’ve set up a countdown clock and buzzer!