Review: Shadows over Camelot

board games, review, poultry bones, lancelot goo
Review: Shadows over Camelot
Quinns: Oh god. OK.

Because board games age so goddamn well, running a board game site can be a bit like running a daycare centre. Those guys can’t rest because it might mean a kid getting stuck behind a radiator or someone eating a rock. We can’t rest because  even if we stay on top of new games, we’re writing under the weight of every awesome game we’ve never played.

Shadows over Camelot is one such older game we need to tell you about. One of HUNDREDS. It never ends, but all the same we’re going to talk about it with the good humour of men throwing a shiny penny into a wishing well.


Retrospective: Ambush!

Ambush!, Retrospective, shit going down
Retrospective: Ambush!
Paul: Right then, shall we look inside a box that hasn’t been opened in at least sixteen years?

Review: Mission- Red Planet

board games, moist carnival rides, crap NASA, the other thing
Review: Mission- Red Planet
Quinns: What are you doing RIGHT NOW? Swallow that food! Drop that baby! We’ve found a board game you should buy. It’s kind of what we do around here.

Mission: Red Planet is a game of racing to colonise Mars in a congenial, steampunk fashion.
3-5 players jostle to load their tiny astronauts into ships on the launchpad board, these land them on the planet board, and you all try and dominate regions and fulfill secret objectives in a game of area
control.


Review: City of Horror

City of Horror, Conniving, Zombies, mashed bananas, SCUMBAGS
Review: City of Horror
Paul: It’s Hallowe’en! Well, it was Hallowe’en last night. Do you go in for Hallowe’en? I don’t, really. I don’t know if that’s because I’m from Hampshire or not. It’s just, you know, a time associated with throwaway seasonal tat and twenty drunk people all dressed as the same Heath Ledger Joker being sick on public transport—

Quinns: PAUL. THE GAME.

Paul: Right! As is proper, we played a board game for Hallowe’en. Something a bit different. A game that’s both a trick and a treat.

Quinns: A shiny new game called City of Horror. This game made our Hallowe’en. And it’s going to make every Hallowe’en after that.


Review: Discworld – Ankh Morpork

board games, sexy sexy clay, greasy guys, a kick in the particulars
Review: Discworld - Ankh Morpork
Quinns: TWO games based on Terry Pratchett’s Discworld books have come out recently. Don’t worry, though. We’re here to guide you through this difficult time. There’s Guards! Guards! which we’ve heard is about as much fun as actually being arrested, but there’s also Discworld: Ankh-Morpork, which we heard is quite good! So we got it and played it. Isn’t that right, Paul?

Paul: That’s right Quinns, and-

Quinns: That’s right!

Paul: …so the best thing we can say about Discworld: Ankh-Morpork is that it’s equal parts family friendly and utter chaos, so it’s perfect for a Discworld game. Two to four players are trying to gain control of the 12 districts of the city of Ankh-Morpork, clutching at power with their clumsily, pudgy hands as if they’re all trying to model clay on the same pottery wheel.

Quinns: Fingers slipping over oily fingers, all of you swearing, someone’s got clay in their eye, until finally the thing comes to a stop and all you’ve made is a mess.



The “Very Third” Shut Up & Sit Down Podcast

podcast, language, Mage Knight, eating ice

Paul: As well as bouncing between topics like a pinball between flippers, this is an important podcast for us for two reasons. First, we’re announcing an exciting thing and second, we’re also asking you, our audience, an important question about a decision we’re thinking of making. But we won’t make it without consulting you first.

Does that sound dramatic? Hopefully it’s whetted your appetite and stimulated your curiosity gland, but BE WARNED- mostly we just talk about games again.

Read the full article...


Review: Star Wars: X-Wing Miniatures Game

board games, miniatures games, mostly giggles, NIGHT BEAST
Review: Star Wars: X-Wing Miniatures Game
Quinns: BAAAA! Ba-da-baa! Ba-ba-da-ba (ba-ba-ba-ba) ba-ba-da-ba (ba-ba-ba-ba) ba-ba-da-ba (ba-ba-ba-ba) ba-ba-da-ba ba baaaaaa… BA BA BA BAAAA. BAAA! Ba ba ba BAAA ba! Ba ba ba BAAAA ba! Ba-bam-ba-baaaa…

That is me singing the STAR WARS theme. I am singing it for you. It is a special treat.

Fantasy Flight’s owned the Star Wars license for more than a year now,
but all that’s meant for us is one passable card game. Until today. The X-Wing Miniatures Game is THE release this month. Tiny, pre-painted spaceships, jinking past lasers that could reduce them to a sneeze in less time than it takes an extra to scream “I’M HIT".

But SHOULD YOU BUY IT? Short answer: “Yes.” Long answer: “Yeeeeeeeeeeaaaaah," followed by a thoughtful pause and a speech like this…



Review: Warrior Knights

Paul’s away! And while Paul’s away, Quinns can review Fantasy Flight’s re-imagining of Warrior Knights! But that’s just for starters. Medieval Strategy Week is just getting started. It’s starting. Here we go.