Shut Up & Sit Down

Review: Robo Rally (2016 edition)

clusterpickles, electric bimbling, bum-first into the robo-bin

Pip: When living with a fellow board game enthusiast you have the benefit of a ready-made companion for cardboard adventures – HOORAY! – but you also start to realise that, for a lot of games that say they’re for 2-to-however-many-players on the side, there’s this disproportionately large leap in enjoyment between the two-player version and the three-or-more-player outings.

Robo Rally might be the ultimate illustration of this. With three people it’s a rambunctious clusterpickle of robots and conflicting agendas where your neatly programmed sequence of moves gets nudged hilariously and disastrously off course. With two we ended up trying to house-rule it so we could ginger up the experience and keep our momentum. Quinns informs me that SU&SD is all about reviewing board games in their favoured conditions, though, so consider this a review of Robo Rally the beloved 3-6 player omnishambles, and not Robo Rally the 2 player compromise-simulator.

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GAMES NEWS! 27/02/17

Boring herbivores, exciting skeksis, the ruddy borg, hot hot hats

Quinns: Good morning sweet shut-upsters! Today is the start of a very solitary couple of weeks on the site. Paul and Matt have gone overseas to run our board game lounge at the yearly Game Developer’s Conference, and then they’re making a top-secret visit to a board game publisher. Like a lighthouse keeper I will be maintaining a lonely vigil. And maybe talking to myself and going a bit mad. We’ll see.

Speaking of maddening things, our top story this week is the above header image that was tweeted by BoardGameGeek. Looks boring, eh? WELL, you’re actually looking at a prototype of Monolith’s next project, Batman: The Board Game, and judging from the dice and stamina crystals it’ll be an evolution of Conan, a miniatures game that this site loved to pieces.

This adaptation makes perfect sense! Conan’s brutal choreography and breathless heroism would be perfect for Batman. But there’s a problem that has me finding this announcement to be bittersweet.

Monolith’s Kickstarters for Conan ($3.3 million) and then Mythic Battles ($2.6 million) have shown that they know how to run an exciting Kickstarter. Clearly, the page for Batman is going to make millions of dollars. But in addition to the sexism that’s run across their games like an oil spill, in this pundit’s opinion Monolith’s been botching the post-release support that I’ve come to expect from expensive games.

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Review: Scythe

always be certain, from like a thicket or something, scythiest

February 25, 2017 Reviews Scythe, kickstarter Things turn very bad indeed when Paul goes outdoors in an attempt to review the Kickstarter megahit Scythe. What does he make of this tremendously successful title, with its giant mechs, slaving peasants and very helpful bear? Can it live up to its tremendous reputation? And what happens to us when … Read more

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Announcing the SU&SD Expansion for Monikers!

it's a box of fun, just put it in your pocket, slide it in

Quinns: Everybody, we’ve got a Kickstarter we’d like to point you towards! Do you all remember Monikers, the effortlessly funny and accessible party game? How would you like an expansion for it created ENTIRELY by the cast of Shut Up & Sit Down?

Ooh, yes! The Shut Up & Sit Down Nonsense Box (this is the link you click on) (click it!) is no less than 112 cards that were dreamed up and playtested by… us! We didn’t get the memo that the card descriptions were only supposed to be informative, so we made those really funny too. Oops.

Don’t have the Monikers base game? Not a problem. The Nonsense Box is a standalone game, or you can chuck the base game onto your pledge as an add-on.

A micro-FAQ follows, after the jump!

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GAMES NEWS! 20/02/17

wooden spaceships, expensive tissues, carrot resources, werewords

Paul: My goodness! We start the news this week with the continuing success story of Vlaada Chvátil and Czech Games. Two new, licensed versions of Codenames have been announced, themed around Marvel and Disney. Surprised?

I can’t say I’m ever likely to buy or play either of them, nor that I’m at all invested in the worlds of either of these entertainment giants, but I do see this as a wonderful way to bring different kinds of licensed games to more players, particularly families, beyond another bloody Monopoly, as well as for Czech Games to earn more well-deserved cash. If someone tells me, in twenty years, that they got into board games through trying to interpret obscure clues about Frozen characters, I’m going to be okay with that.

Okay, hold on, there is also comic potential here. I’m sure there’s all sorts of hilarious clues you can give if you want people to guess both a talking candlestick and a singing elephant, or something slightly sassy you can say about Spider-Man, Victoria Hand and Captain America. Maybe? I don’t actually know anything about comics. Is Garfield DC or Marvel?

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Podcast #53: Matt and Quinns go to the Past!

hair-in-mouth game, finger-in-mouth game, pharmaceutical t***s

Like the plot of every time-travel movie ever, Matt and Quinns have officially gone too far into the past and may never be the same again. In this unusually raunchy edition of the acclaimed SU&SD podcast the pair discuss/complain about some titans of the 80’s and 90’s- Space Hulk, Blood Bowl and Magic: The Gathering. Meanwhile, Paul offers much more sedate comments on Scythe and Santorini. Finally, the group discuss some folk games sent in by an anthropologist… which are played by monkeys. Join us for the critical analysis of Magic, but stick around for our description “Hair In Mouth Game”. Have you played any games from your childhood recently? And were they rubbish?

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Review: Mouse Guard

RACCOON ANXIETY, OXYTOCIN, THE GORDON RAMSEY OF MICE

Cynthia: There’s something extra lovely about roleplaying games in the winter. Where I live in Minnesota, going outside can often be quite deadly, so I prefer to huddle around a table with friends and food and drink. The problem is, being trapped indoors makes me crave adventure. I want to slay monsters, battle evil, brave the ice and cold on a magnificent quest deep into forests and mountains – though I’m not actually going to go outside, of course, that would be insane. The point is, a good RPG lets me have it both ways: grand adventures and the cozy modern comforts of heating, lighting, warm beverages, and pizza delivery. And we all like having it both ways, right? …Right?

Anyway, there is one RPG that this winter has been mollifying my seasonal adventure disorder and warming my heart just like a good cup of hot chocolate with whiskey in it warms your body. That game, my dear readers, is Mouse Guard. So grab your weapons, fluff up your fur, tweak your whiskers, and tap into your anxieties about owls, weasels, and raccoons. You’re about to undertake great and perilous deeds for the sake of all mousekind.

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GAMES NEWS! 13/02/17

pavlovian paul, dog detective, the teasing zone

Paul: Good Monday to you, dear readers. Please, take a seat, take a break, take pause and taaaaake me to the magic of the moment. On a glooooory night.

How appropriate that, while Quinns takes a well-earned break on an unusual and unique Mediterranean island that I am not going to disclose the name of, I’m ready to tell you all about Valletta, a terrifically tempting game of jaunty hats.

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Review: Arkham Horror – The Card Game

chocolate vampires, a spot of light burglary, classic trepanning, screams

My goodness! After we were a little dismissive at Gen Con last year, it turns out that Arkham Horror is the best card game to come out of Fantasy Flight since Netrunner. Pour yourself a glass of interdimensional phlegm, ensure you’re sitting uncomfortably, and let Matt and Quinns tell you why in this spoiler-free review.

If you’re the sort of devil-may-care investigator who doesn’t care about forbidden secrets, don’t forget that you can watch Matt and Quinns play the whole first scenario in this video. Though actually, in hindsight we’ve now realised that it’s a tutorial mission and actually comparatively simple. You should know that far greater twists and terrors await in the full game!

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Feature: A Day in the Life of Matt’s Game Collection!

a good ol' flecking, matt's hats, big-boy joys, it's all about the soup

[Following on from our expedition into Quinns’ board game collection and the polite visit to Paul’s, it’s now Matt’s turn. Enjoy, everybody!]

Matt: Contrary to popular belief, I am not a man of infinite luxury. Paul has an entire cupboard just for games – Quintin has a cavernous loft to explore. Many have climbed that ladder and never been seen alive again, fading away to become a new addition to the dark and dusty collage of cardboard and bones. Basically those boys have space to play with. I however, have a shelf.

But it’s a big shelf! Oh my. There’s plenty of room in the rest of my flat, but my wife is a bit of a cheery dictator when it comes to interior design – so the sins of the husband must be tidied away. It’s occasionally annoying, but it does mean I get to live in a genuinely beautiful, tidy place? Swings and roundabouts, life is compromise.

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