GAMES NEWS! 23/03/20

FAFF REMOVAL SERVICES, IS THAT TWO SHINY PENNIES?, A TEMPORAL NIGHTMARE, JUST DON’T EAT DOGS AT ALL IF YOU CAN AVOID IT TO BE HONEST

Tom: …So they were saying that I didn’t care at all about the game, when really that couldn’t be further from the truth! I was super invested!

Ava: Wait what’s going on are you-

Tom: -and I just found myself getting so frustrated because even though my strategy was a little rough around the edges… Ultimately, I did Care, Too!

Ava: Ha! Just like the… Wait did you go back to the start of the article to edit this bit so that you could make the reference first? Nobody is going to have a clue what’s going on.

Tom: It’ll be like Primer. Everyone will have to go back and read it a second time, and we’ll get paid twice as much.

Ava: Well, you certainly will be, with this lovely shiny penny.

Ava: What’s more mysterious than Mysterium? Science just cannot tell us, but soon we’ll know what’s less Mysterium, with a stripped back sequel, Mysterium Park.

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Review – Wavelength

Harry what the hell, sparkly jackets

How much do you love your mum, Harry? This week we’ve got the timely review of a party game that involves everyone taking it in turns to touch the same hard plastic surfaces over and over again. Wavelength is an absolute joy, and potentially the perfect fit for Party Game Playable Over a Webcam? Just make sure your uncle promises to close his eyes when it isn’t his turn to look. Enjoy the video – and take care everyone!

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GAMES NEWS! 16/03/20

THERE AREN’T ANY NEWTS IN THIS GAMES NEWS, THIS IS A NEWT FREE ZONE

Tom: … So I’ve got all these because I thought you said ‘Games Newts’, it’s just a simple misunderstanding.

Ava: Look, it doesn’t matter, we’ll just get on with the news and absolutely nothing will happen, and nobody will notice and nobody will tell Matt and we’ll all keep our jobs, and you can put them in the Shut Up & Sit Down pond after we’ve finished.

Tom: Oh dang I think two of them escaped, and I think one had a bottle of whiskey and the other was carrying a tiny gun.

Ava: Uh oh. That’s some really bad newts.

New York Zoo is Uwe’s latest attempt to re-bottle the lightning of Patchwork, with a lovely looking tile laying zoo builder. You’ll be filling tiny zoos with tiny animals, and trying to best your opponents in this hopefully sharp family friendly game. Each turn you can either expand your zoo with new tiles or pull more tiny wooden animals onto your board, provided you’ve got the space to house them. On top of this, New York Zoo borrows a bit from some of Uwe’s big farm themed games. Just like in real life, animals will breed when the shared elephant crosses certain thresholds on the central board, helping you fill up enclosures to grab bonuses. It’s like a little Uwe’s greatest hits. Capstone Games is publishing in collaboration with Feuerland and they always make things look pretty.

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Podcast #105: Big Games, Small Podcast

We built Big City out of reee-sin mouuuuulds, an impossible cathedral, Aliems vs Rimpley

DISCLAIMER: The thumbnail for this podcast contains more business than is actually contained in this podcast. Instead, on this short, sleepy episode, a tired old Matt and a sickly young Tom have a meandering chat about just four games.

‘That’s not enough games for my Friday night podcast-listening session!’ I hear you cry, panicked and approaching a point of crisis. Fear not, listener, as this winding little journey will take you through the staggering quite goods of Stockpile, the crushing it’s fines of Big City  and Orleans Stories, before a twist ending where they were all Nemesis all along. Not only that, but there are tiny little trails along the way – a tease of City of the Big Shoulders, for sir? Maybe a trickle of Little Town? It’s all here and it’s all in audio form in this very 105th Shut Up and Sit Down Podcast.

Tap below for full timestamps and more info!

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Review – Unmatched

the cleverest girls, sinbad simulator 2020, "popped corn"

We’ve got two questions for you. Did you see this year’s Undaunted review? And do you want another great 2 player game with “Un” in the name?

Unmatched is a bewitchingly sexy game to collect, it’s a fab little fighting game, and it takes just 20 minutes to finish a whole game. Unless you include the rules explanation, then it takes just 22 minutes.

Enjoy, everybody!

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GAMES NEWS! 09/03/2020

A CROW LOOKED AT ME(EPLE), PINBALL POWERHOUSES, SEASIDE SIESTA, A VERY NIETZSCHE NEWS

Tom: I hate visiting the news nurse’s office.

Ava: Look, you’re lucky that we’ve got the News Health Service so it doesn’t cost you a penny – maybe you should do something to take your mind off the growing, creeping pain from that nasty news infection? They’ve got some light reading here. Would you like a newspaper?

Tom: ARGH. I need a holiday. Matt’s been having me play boardgames all day and then we’ve had to talk about them afterwards? Honestly it’s been my absolute worst nightmare.

Ava: Sounds terrible, how about a Segue-Class flight to Santa Monica? This is one of Alderac’s big releases of the year, promising a delightfully pastel worker-placement drafting game about the titular town. It looks soothing, and could be interesting. Josh Wood previously designed Cat Lady, so has an eye for a quirky relaxing theme. Key choices are about whether your bit of the seafront will be more for tourist bustle or a break from the hustle. To be honest, we don’t have much to go on here, I just really like the art.

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Review – Nemesis

Ridley Not, Nopestromo, Robobrewster, The Git Chronicles

This week’s review puts the EXTRA into extraterrestrial, as Matt and Tom dive into the murky cupboard of Awaken Realm’s Nemesis. Please do note that this video contains scenes that younger viewers may find either awesome or mildly distressing, and finally – should you spot any of the hidden wires used during the special animated sequence, we’d ask that you don’t spoil the wonder of cinema by pointing them out to other viewers. Have a lovely week… IN SPACE.

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GAMES NEWS! 02/03/2020

Is Ryan Gosling real?, Scooby Don’t

Tom: Ow ow ow ow. I got my hands stuck in the news cookie jar.

Ava: Tom, that’s not the news cookie jar, that’s just a mousetrap. What were you even thinking? Let’s get you some nice soothing news before your hand swells up.

Tom: It’s too late! I think I’ve got a news infection!

Ava: Don’t worry about that, get your suit on: we’ve got some business news this week, as what used to be my favourite publisher jumps back to independence. Plaid Hat Games was bought by Asmodee Group in 2015, and has now been bought back by its founder, Colby Dauch. Several of their big titles will be transferred to Fantasy Flight and Z-Man Games, and Plaid Hat will go back to being a (relatively) small fish.

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Podcast #104: ‘Ain’t no party like a Glenmore II: Chronicles party

sponsored by biscuits, sorry about the stings, keep it in, please RSVP to my nice party i need to know how many boardgames to bring

Welcome, diners! Take your seats for the very 104th Shut Up & Sit Down podcast. Enjoy a salty fish supper alongside Oceans, a haggis and a whisky with Glen More II: Chronicles, or a rubbery old hot-dog with Rallyman GT. All options are served with opinions from our cardboard sommelier Matt Lees, and a side of steaming hot takes from our acrylic potwash, Tom Brewster.

Speaking of sides, this week’s podcast features a smorgasbord of canapes, vol au vents and other esoteric snacklets in our detour through Tom’s exclusive, invite-only Party Game Zone™. You can find us in the cordoned off area, chatting about a series of games that you could bring to a party, and smattering of games that you should bring to a party. No +1s are permitted, and BYOB(oardgames).

We also have a post-dinner keynote speech about recent videos on the site – including the palpably divisive review of Bunny Kingdom. Quinns and Tom aren’t on speaking terms after that one, on account of the attempted murder.

Have a lovely weekend all!

Tap below for full timestamps and more info!

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How To Teach Board Games Like a Pro

two pilots is too many, I won't be a power ranger for less than one drink

This week Matt begged Quinns to revisit a topic he’s talked about a little before: what tips could he impart for mastering “The Teach”? It’s the hurdle that stops so many from getting into the hobby – the stumbling block that has seen a many an evening of potential jolly cardboard fun veer off-course into a scene of pure disaster. Whether you’re a seasoned somelier of analog fun or someone who needs the confidence boost to go for it and host, we don’t think there’s any better source of knowledge for teaching people how to teach a board game.

Enjoy! And do let us know if you have any invaluable tips or tricks that you think we’ve missed!

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