Maybe just gaze into the above image. Try and take it all in. Crystals! Robots! Colours! Cards! Three dozen unique kinds of token, each with a different shape, as if they were all so scared of this primary-coloured scrum that they started to collapse in on themselves.
This is Cry Havoc, one of 2016’s most striking and well-received war games, and if you take anything from its Shakespearean name it shouldn’t be wry sophistication, but that this design is as wild and energetic as a pack of dogs.
"Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears!" Let me tell you what I think of this grand box.
That was another quote from Julius Caesar, you see. I might even do another before we're done. Brace yourselves!
Thrower: Well hello there! Nice of you to stop by. Hope you had a good journey. It's rare we get the chance to entertain adult visitors, with all the space the children take up. So, please, let me show you round the house.
The first thing you learn as a parent is that every other parent lives in a pristine house. Even when chasing after kids has left them looking like exhausted pandas, their houses are still clean and tidy. Naturally, ours has to be the same. We'd all be happier if everyone could drop this charade and wallow in their familial filth. Anyway, it's nice to have someone here who might appreciate the results.
Hang your coat up over there...
I have good news, friends. It turns out that in the game of Flamme Rouge (French for "Red Flam") you can become a cycleman for no less than 30 to 45 minutes at a time. Clearly we had to give it the full review treatment, and you know what? It turns out that this game is an absolute delight.
Have a fantastic weekend, everybody!
UPDATE: Thanks to SU&SD fan Meeple101 for telling us about the official Flamme Rouge Companion for iOS and Android, which lets you link individual races into a grand tour! What fun.
So what's in this one? Ooh, only Quinns discussing the electrifying yet accessible escape rooms of Unlock! (which has a free demo available online), the insanity of Magic Maze (which also has a free print-n-play version) and the challenging slumbers of When I Dream, while Paul outlines his pathetic enjoyment of Kingdomino and his struggling TV station in The Networks.
We close with Quinns talking about Snakes & Ladders after discovering an astonishing article on its history, and finish with a Christian folk game that leaves the pair even more speechless than usual. Let's just say that teenagers should never be given power, but especially not iron age judicial power. Enjoy, everybody!
Quinns: I might have just read too many Game of Thrones books, but this announcement seemed undercut with an amount of... intrigue.
Paul: What do you mean? MURDER?
Quinns: Oh god, no! Will you stop guessing that everyone's murdering one another?
Quinns: I'll allow it!
Paul: Diamant is probably the most fun I’ve had for the least investment of time and energy SO FAR THIS YEAR. I’m so sorry. I just had to blurt that. It’s a petite wonder. PETITE. WONDER. Like… Danny DeVito. Or... a teabag?
Quinns: You’re arriving at this party a little late though, aren’t you? Last year I called Incan Gold the best little push-your-luck game I’d played in forever. Diamant is just a beautiful new edition of the same game! You can’t talk about it like you’ve just found a dead sea scroll in your back garden.
Paul: All right, all right, back that boulder up, snarkaeologist. Incan Gold? The 2006 game? And when did you come to it, exactly?
Quinns: Erm. 2016.
Paul: An entire decade of incompetence.
Basically we reached 2,500 backers and decided we'd like to improve the product you guys were getting. Think of it as a kind of thank you for helping us to stretch past our original goal. We're calling this addition a "Girth Objective" and it's my guess that by 2020 every Kickstarter will have one.
As of this week every backer of the Nonsense Box Kickstarter will get a free pack of Hopelessly Stupid Fourth Round Cards. You see, Monikers is a game that starts off very pedestrian in round 1 and becomes marginally more interesting in round 2 before going completely insane in round 3. But as old Monikers pros will tell you, you can keep playing and the game gets dumber and funnier with every additional round. "Charades but under a bedsheet" has to be played to be believed.
We have a tenative list already drawn up, but we're well aware that you guys are often funnier and smarter than us in our comment threads. If you have an idea for a fourth round for Monikers, and would like to see it on a card with your name on it and a professional illustration, please leave a comment below!
Thanks so much, everyone. <3
For this uncanny place is our Earth, far, far, far into the future, after our civilization and seven others have climbed, peaked, fallen, and been rusted over. More than one alien invasion has occurred, and more than one alien species has mingled genes with humanity. A new civilization has arisen, but hasn't really gotten past the middle ages. The perplexing debris of past civilizations, from humming obelisks and transdimensional portals to enchanted amulets and portable CD players, is everywhere. The people of earth call these weird objects "filled-with-power-things": numenera.
Welcome to the Ninth World, the setting of Monte Cook's Numenera. I would say, "come on in, the water's fine," but it's probably filled with flesh-eating microdroids or laced with bubble-gum flavored psychotropic drugs or something. But forget the water, there's so much here. This place is so ancient, and vast, and tremendous. Let's explore!
Paul: OH MY GOD I’M BACK.
Quinns: OH MY GOD.
Paul: Did I miss anything while I was aw-
Quinns: ONLY THE GIGANTIC RISING SUN KICKSTARTER, THE CAMPAIGN FOR THE GRIZZLED, THE BIG NEWS ABOUT RUNE WARS AND THIS CRAZY NEW MUSIC MIXING GAME.
Paul: …Were you eating properly while I was gone?