Card Games 7 - Shut Up & Sit Down

Review: Babel

Matt Lees: Paul, do you like temples?

Paul Dean: I don’t really know much about temples and I don’t come across them much in Lewisham. The last templeish thing I saw was the Grand Lodge of the Freemasons in San Francisco. It had some pretty unusual sculptures outside and I was too scared to go in, so I took some photos really quickly and then scurried off.

Matt: How many points do you think it was worth?

Paul: Pardon?

Matt: How many points? How many levels was it? Are they winning?

Paul: Oh I get it, this is a Babel review.

It’s the end of the world. Survivors huddle together, sheltering in rags and silence. There are bad men outside. And you’re one of them.

Arctic Scavengers is a card game for 2-5 players, and this week the updated edition first fell into our laps, then entered our hearts, like cardboard frostbite. Better yet, it’s Quinns’ favourite of all the games we’ve reviewed this year!

Oh dear. Wallets at the ready, people.

Like vinyl records or the world’s most cheerful case of herpes, The Opener is BACK! Once again, Matt wants to guide you through the perfect game + recipe to open either your game night, your friends’ minds or your own board game collection. This time it’s Coup, a teeny little game of being a disgraceful liar.

If you’ve missed The Opener until this point, you’re in for a whole selection of treats. We’ve got Mascarade and cheesy twists, Ultimate Werewolf and chilli con carne, Ladies & Gentlemen and homemade scones, and even fire-fighting game Flashpoint and some flaming B-52s.

Shut Up & Sit Down: Working to make board gaming figuratively and literally delicious since 2011.

The more we play it, the more we feel that Living Card Game Android: Netrunner is one of the greatest things happening in table gaming right now. A deadly, tense game that evolves every single month, with players around the world panicking and giggling over new data packs.

Following on from Quinns’ review, we thought we’d finish our coverage with a Let’s Play. But not just any Let’s Play. Here, Quinns walks Matt through his very first game, which we hope (together with the hypnotising official tutorial) should give you all the encouragement you need to get started.

Look how easy it is! …To end up dead at your computer! But also, to have a lovely time. If you do decide to get involved, Terminal7‘s the Netrunner podcast you want, you’ll find those fancy tokens here, and Meteor is your online deckbuilder tool. Good luck, everybody.

Quinns: Full disclosure! Guts of Glory is the work of a couple of friends of mine, and their background isn’t in table gaming, but the prestigious New York game design scene. And you can tell.

The manual’s hilarious. The box has some kind of space age linen finish, and art that goes all the way around it. Most importantly, it’s a game with a theme that isn’t contemporary, historical, fantasy, sci-fi, horror, adventure or steampunk, which is something I can say about zero of the eighty games in my living room. Here, finally, is something inventive.

Guts of Glory is a post-apocalyptic, surrealist, competitive eating competition. A game of using motor oil to wash down boxes of spiders, or snatching an extra jaw from another player to help you chew a time machine. If that doesn’t intrigue you, my last recourse is the following line from the manual: “Play begins with the hungriest player. If there is a tie, play begins with the angriest player.”

If you’re driving a car, pull over. If you’re holding a baby, please place it on the nearest flat surface. There’s a new game from our favourite designer, Vlaada Chvátil, and it’s time to put it to the test.

Tash-Kalar: Arena of Legends looks nothing like anything Vlaada’s made before. No surprise there. But it also looks a bit rubbish. Will SU&SD have to liquidise the Church of Vlaada once and for all?

Would you like to come on an ADVENTURE? Get some treasure, some glory, back home in time for tea?

So you’ll come? …What’s that? Oh, nowhere special. Just the Cutthroat Caverns. No! Come back! It’s only a name!

What about you, dear reader? Will you join us? If you’re brave enough, you’ll see there’s an awful lot of fun to be had in those dingy, treacherous caverns. Assuming you’re just a bit of a jerk.

[Order, order. All rise for his honour Matt Drake, who returns to us once again with another review, this time of a game that’s gaining quite the reputation around these parts. Is such a reputation deserved? Well, Mr. Drake has a few things to say. Please, take your seats and remain quiet while the review is in progress.]

The Pathfinder Adventure Card Game came out a couple months ago, and the internet has been a-go-go with praise. I have read glowing reviews, had friends tell me it was simply amazing and heard people compare it to solid-gold toilets with built-in bidets. (I made up that toilet thing. I don’t actually know anyone who thinks a gold toilet would be a good idea.)

Well, allow me to retort.

Apologies for all the murder that’s been going on this week. It’s very inconvenient. Can Seasons, a game of great wizardy, set things right, or is there only worse to come?

We’re also proud to present the return of Boardgaming with Brendan, and our long-awaited concept review of Dominant Species! Maybe not having Quinns around isn’t so bad after all.

The Opener: Ultimate Werewolf & Chilli Con Carne

With Halloween just around the corner (or, as we call it here in England, “All Hallow’s Ween”), we’re very proud to present part 1 of our spooktacular gaming suggestions! Neatly reviewed in time for you to place and receive your order in time for the sexiest night of the year. Or was that Pancake Tuesday?

Anyway, to begin with, what could be simpler, safer or spookier than an evening of Ultimate Werewolf? Just you, a big pot of chilli, and between 4 and 60 of your closest friends.

Review: Babel

Review: Arctic Scavengers

The Opener: Coup & Sweet Potato Fries

SU&SD Play… Android: Netrunner

Review: Guts of Glory

Review: Tash-Kalar

Review: Cutthroat Caverns

Review: Pathfinder Adventure Card Game

Review: Seasons

The Opener: Ultimate Werewolf & Chilli Con Carne

Feeds