Quinns: Boy? I’m 33 years old.
Ava: Tell me boy, is it still Chronicles Month?
Quinns: Oh, absolutely it is.
Ava: Wonderful! Then there’s still time. Head over to Shut Up & Sit Down and fetch me the plumpest, ripest news in the window.
In this unusually raunchy edition of the acclaimed SU&SD podcast the pair discuss/complain about some titans of the 80's and 90's- Space Hulk, Blood Bowl and Magic: The Gathering. Meanwhile, Paul offers much more sedate comments on Scythe and Santorini.
Finally, the group discuss some folk games sent in by an anthropologist... which are played by monkeys. Join us for the critical analysis of Magic, but stick around for our description "Hair In Mouth Game".
Have you played any games from your childhood recently? And were they rubbish?
If you're interested in the details then Board Game Geek has already uploaded a comprehensive Essen preview video, but I'm unconvinced. I want to revisit Magic: The Gathering like I want to revisit puberty.
Speaking of which, as we don't have any more news this week why don't I share my sad story of playing Magic when I was a kid? Take a seat. Or if you're at work, slide your wheely chair a little closer to your PC, creating a calming snugness between your thighs and your desk. It's almost like being in bed.
We'll start with the reveal of the above image, which is the box contents for undersea power struggle Abyss. This game looked exquisite before I knew that it included pearls as a currency, or that the stunning cover is only one of five different boxes. I love what the publishers are doing here so, so much. If this design was any more arresting I'd be in fish prison.
No time for a long introduction! Grab your hat, coat, and thrashing-stick and come with me. This time I maunder about some house rules the Gaming Chums use to ratchet up the tension and increase the complexity of games, and possibly to increase the conflict and turn the finest of friends turn into slavering killbeasts*.
Enter Antoine Bauza’s Rampage, which should be landing this year. Bauza’s one of our favourite designers here at SU&SD, having crafted 7 Wonders and Ghost Stories, both of which are capable of collapsing your face into deep thought like a strong man might fold a deck chair.
With Rampage, 2-4 players will be dropping their wooden kaiju monsters to crush buildings, blowing on civilians to claim their pathetic lives and even flicking themselves at one another in foul, animal anger. Doesn’t that sound perfect?
First published in 1993 by Wizards of the Coast, Magic was the first trading card game produced and it continues to thrive, with approximately twenty million players as of 2015. Magic can be played by two or more players in various formats, the most common of which uses a deck of 60+ cards, containing no more than 4 of a single card with the exception of basic land cards, either in person with printed cards or using a deck of virtual cards through the Internet-based Magic: The Gathering Online, on a smartphone or tablet, or other programs.
Each game represents a battle between wizards known as "planeswalkers", who employ spells, artifacts, and creatures depicted on individual Magic cards to defeat their opponents. Although the original concept of the game drew heavily from the motifs of traditional fantasy role-playing games such as Dungeons & Dragons, the gameplay of Magic bears little similarity to pencil-and-paper adventure games, while having substantially more cards and more complex rules than many other card games.
New cards are released on a regular basis through expansion sets. An organized tournament system played at an international level and a worldwide community of professional Magic players has developed, as well as a substantial secondary market for Magic cards. Certain Magic cards can be valuable due to their rarity and utility in game play, with prices ranging from a few cents to thousands of dollars.